I post whatever I want, when I want.

posted 2 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 2,612 notes

inhonoredglory:

larahorrendoushaddockiii:

luluboolovesyou:

Early design for Hiccup and Toothless

HI SORRY I NEED THIS ON MY BLOG AGAIN

AHHH! It’s like in the books ♥♥

Gosh this is so precious. We’re really watching Hiccup grow up in this franchise. *proud tear*

(Source: glxdos, via jackfrost-flakes)

posted 2 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 122,897 notes

chapmen:

a modern hero

(via bondage-photography)

posted 2 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 66,032 notes
posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 41,627 notes

ewmartin:

crazy-jensenackles-fangirl:

so apparently people talk to their pets in baby voices, but when i see my cat i’m just like ‘hey brad’ and he’s like ‘meow’ and the conversation is over.

I don’t know why but for some reason the fact that your cat’s name is brad is hilarious to me

(via joshpeck)

posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 300,337 notes

epic-humor:

#COOL PARENTS

(Source: pleatedjeans, via toodopetoexist)

posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 145,200 notes

cubrone:

cubrone:

knightscrest:

dating an identical twin scares me bc what if i get them confused

i read a book once where this girl was romantically involved with this guy who had a twin and they would punk her all the time and be like which one is your boyfriend you have to kiss the right one and then it turned out one of them was evil and trapped her in a dungeon with a bunch of rats or some shit

but that’s like, worst case scenario

(via vanillahazelslut)

posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 1,162 notes

kimkhollywoodposts:

image

me

image

sure bitch lol

(via southernsummers0)

posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 47,317 notes

belledudette:

tanpom:

mrbiggsproductions:

michaelfieldstephens:

wherethestaplesat:

Finally I can shit without the fear of people listening in

thats some mlg tier shitter brah

the future is now

that is literally part of headphones photoshopped onto a toilet

this made me laugh more than it should’ve omg

(Source: memecenterz, via toodopetoexist)

posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 81,644 notes

coolator:

lntruding:

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.


UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

~


O
kay. I don’t know how you ho-nuggets don’t understand this by now, because I sourced this post to another site 3 FUCKING TIMES IN THIS GODFORSAKEN POST. BUT THIS BURRITO POST IS NOT MINE. 

I DISCLAIMED THIS SHIT A LONG LONG TIME AGO.

CLICK HERE FOR AN EXPLANATION AS TO HOW THIS IS NOT MINE

AND CLICK HERE FOR YET ANOTHER FUCKING LINK OF THE ACTUAL FUCKING SOURCE YOU DENSE MOTHERFUCKERS.

This is the greatest thing I have ever read on the internet.

(via anotherlittleworld)

posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 210,176 notes

opalling:

phenomical:

floweurli:

concising:

theskinnytaste:

I swear to god I can read “you hurt me”

reblogging bc wow

this kills me

is this reall????

i read this as “you lame” but i guess thats more romantic

(Source: witchoria, via realiz3)

posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 438,170 notes
posted 3 hours ago on July 22, 2014 with 20,797 notes
  • baby: a- a- a-
  • parents: oh, the baby's first words!!
  • baby: a- aaa- al-
  • parents: apple?? air??
  • baby: a- al- al-
  • baby: Alchemy. The science of understanding, deconstructing, and reconstructing matter. However, it is not an all-powerful art; it is impossible to create something out of nothing. If one wishes to obtain something, something of equal value must be given. This is the Law of Equivalent Exchange, the basis of all alchemy. In accordance with this law, there is a taboo among alchemists: human transmutation is strictly forbidden - for what could equal the value of a human soul...?